오네죽 169

Oh, first thing I noticed from this chap is it’s almost twice the length! Awww, with 6.7K words, you have hit your new length too Writer-nim! Congralutationsss! Lollll 151화 with 5.9K becomes pale in comparison! 

LOLLLLLL I bet you started writing and went with the flow *(:

[CULLEN’S RESURRECTION] 

Still, it’s fortunate for us that everything goes in one go. Well, now the process of resurrection Cullen is complete in one single chapter. If it goes on, us readers might explode with anticipation before tomorrow’s chapter comes! Oh, I was surprised it went quite simply without much ritual. But then ritual of will is the most important, and so it DOES work when Kiyen puts all his heart’s desire into his call to the goddess, and well to Cullen. 

But then, as the goddess says it is up to Kiyen and do not waste your chance. It seems to be so much more hidden behind. I feel giving up immortality is not the only test Kiyen is given. The task equal to Cullen’s as giving up own life is already over. But now it’s the test of going through thick and thin like Cullen has done for him continues up next as well. How Kiyen would bare his heart naked and prove it to Cullen through his constant actions. Still, it’s a long way to go for the two to tune up.

And now Cullen is now in his dry and expressionless mode again!!! It’s so HARD to decipher everything from just this half page! Trulyyyy! Writer-niiimmmm T_T I try to read and re-read this phrase many times to see if I can get more of its meaning of “두 분이 왜…… 여기 계시는 겁니까.”

It could be that Cullen has lost his emotions during the death-and-resurrection process, and it also could be that Cullen has set the wall inside his heart again. I’d rather want it to be from the latter when Cullen becomes mentally exhausted to deal with emotions and feeling and get tangled in human relationship. This is because the first explanation would be from the external factor, and not by himself, nor his own choice.

But it shouldn't be memory loss like Kiyen believes???! That would be external factor too!

Let it be that Cullen has set the wall inside his heart!!!! This is my sincere and last assumption!!

AWWWWW, should I type this down and make this an evidence of my thought? If I am right I will sure be happy, but if I’m wrong I will feel sad I could not get the meaning right? And can’t succeed to my role as a reader! But hahaha, it’s best to wait for tomorrow and see more! 

But awww, it’s certain that Cullen’s reaction is NOT what Kiyen has in mind! Poor dragon, he remembers and never forgets anything. That’s why now engraved in his mind are the sweetest and finest moments together. And that’s making the contrast even better. The one and only love Cullen is not smiling back at him nor Cullen clings to him like before. Awwww, two hearts run opposite ways! Kiyen goes mellow, and Cullen goes rigid now!  

Still, everything can go but the heart scar! it's crucial to leave the evidence! In truth, it bares the impact of Cullen's great act, AND it will remind Kiyen of the love and the sacrifice Cullen's done for him. Not just to fulfill the promise but simply to make him happy.

[DRAGONS ]

It’s quite noticeable that the little ones know Kiyen’s heart better than Kiyen himself. But then as Kiyen said that they were born in different times and different environments, not to mention from different sources, the dragon himself did not have anyone to teach him emotions or anyone to share them with. So, he’s lacking in this regard. He’s been sad, but he never knows it before. Awww.. this is tragic! 

Oh, these three little dragons sure have their share from Mama Dragon! They are affectionate and caring. It’s adorable that the kids sing the same tone when they wish for Kiyen’s happiness too. They are small, but they are adorable! Ohhh!

But then, Gold, are you a mood ruiner too? I know you are! When Gold tells Black and White about everything he witnesses, it seems to get serious and heavy. But what it is with Kiyen has a very nice name, and them three have only names according to colours? Hahaha, you know poor Gold, having a name means it is supposedly given by the other person. If Kiyen could do good naming, do you think he would be a no-name dragon until Cullen passes by??!! He would have given himself a grand name thousand years ago!   

[LASANO]

Awww, should I touch the pain and suffering that change Lasano too? Now he’s lost everything precious to him, and everything he leaves for. Is it the same for Ully I wonder? The party members find a home in themselves, but now everything crumples away…   

Still, in a way, I was wondering if we could also say that Cullen’s death does not only come from the sense of disappointment and betrayal Kiyen feels. It is actually an accumulation from series of events — starting from Lasano’s betrayal and later Kihelen’s selfishness— that both estrange the lovers and put Kiyen to the limit. Somewhat such sequences of actions are all the causes of Cullen’s death, and these two are to blame too.

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LET ME GO RUMBLING, I CANT HELP ITTTTT

IT’S THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER I KNOW     T_T

Cullen’s feelings for Kiyen are reverent kind of love. Cullen puts Kiyen above everything, even the goddess. In a way, it can be very blind and suicidal when loving Kiyen is like salvation for Cullen. He can love without guilt, without fear. However, he’s happy when the dragon is good to him, and he’s sad when the dragon turns cold. In a way, Cullen’s like ‘the giving tree’, he gives, he gives, and he gives until he himself is exhausted.

Still, with always-there-and-always-care affection, the receiver is taken it for granted. Kiyen receives Cullen’s feelings but he has a reservation in his mind. Although he does Cullen now, that long prejudice of finding and loving his own kin is clouding his emotions. And different lifespan makes it impossible for Kiyen who have seen many come-and-go Larkans to feel that Cullen will stay in his mind. Kiyen is everything to Cullen, but Cullen is not everything to Kiyen. And I hate to see this imbalanced love power.

So, I’m excited to see this power shift. Yes, I still wanna see Cullen slows down while Kiyen rushes in. But I’m not so sure about regretting part. Kiyen has more than enough of his worst shares already. Especially with everything he’s been through. Like Kiyen himself said, the explanation is given, but none of the feelings and wrongnesses is lifted too, and he has to bear the consequences of others’ actions. What's more is Cullen has been indulging Kiyen so much, so much that Kiyen puts everything in him, and when Kiyen can't find support he expects from Cullen, his disappointment leads to harsh actions. Awww, despite Kiyen's gentle effort to put the term of the contract away from Cullen until the very last moment in the first place. Emotions rule, and it is revealed in the ugliest way indeed ....

Well then, dragon now you know your feelings! Please go clingy and go obsessive, and go possessive!! O GREAT dragonnnn, you have GREAT potentials!! You’ve done that many times before you know your own heart! So now bring it on even more! And make the readers proud!

So, Kiyen, you have to do better! Keep trying! Don’t waste your chance! Cullen has last through many of your rejections and shunnings. Now you have to do the same!  Go! Go! Do your best!